Whiteness and Toxic Masculinity

“I need more white paint chips to choose from.”

“Okay, I’ll stop by the store soon and get a bunch. How white are you wanting the cabinets?”

“Very white.”

Have you ever looked at paint color names and wondered how they come up with them? Or thought you could do so much better? I mean, there were a couple of whites in the white section called something gray, but clearly they were a shade of white.

I have no idea.

Here, for your amusement and mine, are white paint color names I’d like to see used. Any similarity to trademarked names already in use is purely coincidental

White White

Super Duper White

Really Really White

Very White

Extremely White

Brilliant White

Sparkling White

Gleaming White

Pure White

The Whitest White in the History of White

Whiter than White

Ice Ice Baby

Mary’s Little Lamb (You may recall its fleece was white as snow.)

Joel Osteen’s Teeth

Transfiguration

Only White

Nothing But White

So White It’s Racist

White as a ghost?

I’ll stop there.

In other news, I’ve been listening to the new The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill podcast by Christianity Today. You may or may not be familiar with the now defunct Mars Hill Church in Seattle, Washington, and its founding pastor Mark Driscoll. (I knew only a little.) Viewer discretion is strongly advised, but if you want some insight into why so many people are fed up with evangelical churches, megachurches, and Christianity in general, it’s important content.

A couple things have struck me so far while listening to the podcast. Abuse (spiritual, verbal) was excused because “look at the fruit!”, meaning large numbers of new church members, baptisms, etc. I’ve heard those exact words used in other settings to justify behavior that was anything but Christlike. While I believe God can and does use / redeem anything to accomplish his purposes, that doesn’t mean we should excuse the bad stuff, that we should have done the bad stuff, or that we should ever do the bad stuff again.

Grace and forgiveness rule, but so do boundaries when necessary.

As I have sat with that “but look at the fruit” line, I came to a realization. Spiritual abuse isn’t committed only by those with conservative views. It may be more common on the conservative end of the religious spectrum, but it can happen in any setting.  

The other thing that hit me is … was Mark Driscoll the inspiration for the term “toxic masculinity”? Being conservative and somewhat traditional in certain ways, I have rolled my eyes over that phrase. What’s wrong with masculinity? I like masculine men. But the behavior and the doctrine espoused by this pastor from the pulpit? Wow. I have even more compassion than I already did for survivors of church hurt / abuse.

As with most situations in life, people are almost never one hundred percent bad or one hundred percent good. The lingering question is … how did Mars Hill happen, how was it allowed to happen, and what can we learn from it? Definitely worth a listen.

Love, peace, and grace to you all.

What a tangled web we weave …
The sweet potato fries were amazing.
So this was on when I walked past the tv.
Whew! No Canadians harmed.
Keep looking up, even if it’s hazy and askew.

Share this post:

2 replies on “Whiteness and Toxic Masculinity”

Comments are closed.